There is no accurate time for this; it all depends about family’s life, timing, habits of the kid, and the parents. Should it be when they start speaking, or earlier? It’s possible to start before, but obviously, only the parents can talk about their day, their feelings, and generally about anything that they want to share with their kid. In this case, later on, when they talk to you, just simply continue the evening talk.
In my home, every evening, we have warm dinner and we all sit down and not just eat, but also chat.
This is the time when we are together, putting away the “toys” and enjoying the peace and love around us. I remember starting this much earlier than my son’s birth. It was always there; just the two of us. But I also remember doing that alone, while going home, preparing a nice warm dinner, sitting down and thinking over my day.
But the game is getting more exciting when your kid already starts talking too. At age 3 to 4, they start to get very talkative, they are able to tell full stories and listen to yours. The evenings are very good choice to do so, because most of the families are together by that time, having a dinner, or playing together.
It all depends on the family habits. If you want to make it an everyday practice, you can start to talk or ask them around the dinner table; everyone is there, everyone is calm, the day is almost over, everybody can think what happened throughout the day and share things with the other members of the family. It’s good to be together because if there is a problem, it’s better to solve it together.
Later, this will give a very strong background to your children
When they will have “problems” or serious things to share, they will know they can open it up in that environment, they can trust their parents and the strength of the family.
Giving them security and the fact that they are not alone, they won’t have to face their problems on their own.
Another option if you choose to do it in the evening, is during bedtime. After you tell an evening tale, you can ask your little one to tell you how his day went, what was positive and negative about it. As if there are any feelings or thoughts in his mind that he wants to share. Everything is positive, everything is good.
We used to have an order on who will start talking about one’s day and how. Kids need rules and frames, that will give them stability.
Positive effects of evening talks
- They won’t go to sleep with a heavy heart
- You will know about their problems
- Your will learn a lot abut your children
- You can give them advice
- You can support them
- They become calm and relaxed if they can open up about their problems
- Later on, when drug, sex and other sensitive and serious subjects will come up, you will have a connection to your child
- Building mutual trust between parents and the child
- You can share your own thoughts about life, which they can learn from
- Sharing your life experiences to them
- You can win their trust
- When they see that you’re honest with them and not hiding your feelings from them, they will do the same if they have something to say
- You will probably know their little secrets
These things will give you and to your child a priceless present: gratefulness.